6.18.07: That Loving Feeling
Think Before You Twink
It’s pretty easy to get on gamers for not stopping to exercise, or stopping long enough to make non-toxic meals. I mean, why not be incredulous when they can play for 6 hours, but not spend 10 minutes making a salad and/or 30 minutes walking or running around the block? Its easy to think that a gamer is neglectful (and I’m not saying that they aren’t), but the nature of addiction, and even immersion into gaming, can often preclude being able to do these things during a play session.
Don’t jump! There’s so much to live for, and you’re only a young man… And you’ll only take a non-lethal percentage-based fall damage!
So hardcore gamers: take advantage of the excited feeling that often pops up before you play. If you think that you have the time to play for a few hours, or you’re excited enough by a game that you’re going to play whether or not you’ve got the time, then it may serve your stomach well to prepare something beforehand. That way, whether or not you feel like making something during worth eating after your session is over, you’ll still have something to eat before crashing into a bed. Or to eat while you stop chain healing and wait for the raid to wipe. Basically, you don’t want to starve yourself, and your mom wasn’t lying when she said 2 straight weeks of hot pockets could kill you.
Exercise is important too (sitting can kill you, after all), but let’s not get our hopes up.
That Loving Feeling
I’ll admit, today I played enough to surprise myself. What’s interesting is that after only first starting to play yesterday, I noticed throughout the day that there was almost this underlying murmur, tempting me. It was a very, very subtle nudge which seemed to communicate: “Sure, doing this real world work is good, and benefits your long-term goals… but gaming would be just a little bit more yummy in your tummy.” Dun dun duuuuuuuun. That feeling is back after only one day.
I feel a little bit like Darth Vader just revealed himself as my true father. I’m searchin’ those feelings, and I know that getting into WoW again isn’t giving me exactly what I envisioned 2 days ago. I know it to be true.
But is there still some good in him? I mean, it’s been so long since the whole Youngling incident…
Whoa, nevermind. With a face like that you’d probably better jump, orcy mcsuave.
I also got a bit sick.
Let’s talk about that, shall we? This was actually really fascinating for obscure pseudoscience reasons. While pumping mad iron at the gym today, I was suddenly struck silly by this overwhelming urge to vomit. I’ve gotten a little bit light-headed at the gym before. You know, a lot of midgets stealing my oxygen. (Inside joke follows: “So you hit the midget with the manhole cover because he was stealing your oxygen?â€). Still, this was different. I actually walked to the bathroom, feeling utterly and completely motion sicknessed, and I just had to wonder. Was something about going back and forth between WoW and real life tripping out my physiological systems? I went from getting excited over SS crits, to getting the same chemical level of excitement from benching 300 pounds on the reverse rowing machine (rofl). Fascinating, I do say! Hip hip!
Time Played Today: 4 hours 42 minutes, plus about a half an hour of playing with character creation. Sweet Jesus!
Time Breakdown: It’s interesting how the time adds up. About a half an hour while making a dinner-sized lunch for me and my girlfriend (better to eat bigger meals earlier on in the day). About an hour and a half of mindless playing while my gf and I listened to some Harry Potter books on tape. Then, after she’d gone to sleep, I turned on some ethnic Turkish music and wound up playing for another two and a half hours. I’m not surprised, but I am not happy about it. I wouldn’t say that I’m disappointed, since the gaming has (at least in the short term!) put me into a far better mood than I’d been this week. The random gym sickness was also still running strong at 10pm, and the playing helped (or at least distracted me until it was gone/long enough for me to quit focusing on it).
Conclusion: I’m enjoying the writing portion of this experiment way more than is healthy.
Neils Clark :: Jun.19.2007 :: Neils' Gaming Journal ::
“…since the gaming has (at least in the short term!) put me into a far better mood than I’d been this…”
Okay, key point here. Why are you needing to alter your mood state with your old ‘fix’ now?
“There’s deeper stuff going on in your life” says my inner Freud.
Well, definitely. Most of the really big issues actually were resolved a few days ago, but in thinking a little bit below the surface I’m currently battling some self-effectiveness issues. I get alot of cool stuff done in a given day, but there’s an underlying “ugh” (anxiety?) that I get when none of it is on my checklist!
Emotionally, I think that my body has some notion that gaming isn’t a full panacea, though I obviously still haven’t lost that loving feeling. Since waking up, I’ve still felt that dull hum of “gaming would be just a bit more fun, hey you should play before working with today’s client!”
What would Uncle Carl say about all of this?
Nice! The best part is bench press sickness, now you are working out. Push it baby! Remember what the Hakagure has to say…
“It is not good to settle into a set of opinions. It is a mistake to put forth effort and obtain some understanding and then stop at that. At first putting forth great effort to be sure that you have grasped the basics, then practicing so that they may come to fruition is something that will never stop for your whole lifetime. Do not rely on following the degree of understanding that you have discovered, but simply think, “This is not enough.” One should search throughout his whole life how best to follow the Way. And he should study, setting his mind to work without putting things off. Within this is the Way.”
Push it
Another 2 and half hours!! Does that mean I can’t go to bed or you will play. hmmm…and what Shavaun…you say it’s ok to play!!! well I guess…!
We’ll see how things go.
I’ve got my therapist, my girlfriend, and at least one friend on this thread… It’s like an episode of Jerry Springer.
Just need “gf” to run out at me with a blackjack… Or some pickles…
But its only because we care.
I appreciate it.
I would never label you an addict, but since you’ve identified yourself that way, I value you too much to argue with your opinions.
So. Knowing what we know about dopamine, how do you think it’s been working in your head lately - like right before you started playing again, once you started playing, and during the time since when you had to work?
What does it feel like being Neils this week? How does your body feel? What’s happening with your emotions over the course of the day/days? How are you perceiving the world, perceiving yourself?
There are likely different parts of you (various layers of thoughts/feelings) telling you conflicting things right now. I’d love to hear more about it.
I’m curious.
4 hours of wow is nothing.
It really is all about the turkish music.